Post by johnb1 on Dec 15, 2014 9:50:56 GMT -5
And it was written that John did stop for lunch at the palace of Royal burgers, and he didst buy a Big King , a double whopper, and a large french fry, for he was sore hungry. And he did go home, and feast, and quench his hunger, whereupon he fell into a deep slumber. Here he saw a vision of the King of Burgers who told him "John, you will be visited by 3 Sphincter Spirits tonight-The Ghost of Whoppers Past, the Ghost of Whoppers Present, and the Ghost of Whoppers yet to be". John dismissed these words, saying unto the vision "Yea, thou are full of crap", to which the King said "No, I saw how you scarfed down that burger and fries, I am not, but you may be", and with that the vision disappeared. The words of the vision came true, John was visited by the first spirit after lunch who came and blew his trumpet. And it was loud, long and horrible. Then, before the evening concert he had to perform, he ate the double whopper and it was mighty good, and the words of the vision came true again. He was visited by a second spirit who blew his trumpet at the end of the rehearsal, when John was bending down to pack his bass. And, it too was long loud and horrible, and again in the parking lot of the place he was playing, and once in the car, and when he got out of the car and went home. Now, John became afraid and said "Oh King, must I be visited by this last spirit? Can you show me mercy, your Majesty?". The King was not in a forgiving mood. He was a mean King and rarely did he show mercy. And the spirit did visit John early in the morning,and he blew his horn, once in the shower, once while getting out of bed, and the Spirit did give John the gift of soiled shorts, a total butt blowout, and there was much consternation and cursing. so, dear Readers: There it is-my Christmas tale for this year-Mess with the King and you will pay for it-after you've enjoyed it, of course
John B
John B