|
|
Post by Jersey on Dec 16, 2007 17:13:46 GMT -5
Yeah, you read right. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I hope I never have to do it again. She asked me for so much more than I could give and then got angry with me for not doing it...there are just some things a 20 year old college student can't do.
Guys, and girls too, if you ever find yourself unhappy in a relationship, just break it off. It's pointless to keep on going if you aren't happy. Even if you love the person, you need to love yourself even more to be happy.
What a tough night.
|
|
|
|
Post by Classicblast on Dec 16, 2007 17:22:10 GMT -5
Sorry pal.
But take it a few days at a time and you never know sometimes fences mend and other times you realize its just time to ride off in the sunset.
|
|
|
|
Post by Demona on Dec 17, 2007 6:38:42 GMT -5
what did she ask of you?
|
|
|
|
Post by Beangirl on Dec 17, 2007 13:03:35 GMT -5
I am so sorry Bud. I hope you heal quickly. You sound like a pretty wise person. I applaud your courage.
|
|
aido179
Moderator 
posts: 5867
Posts: 458
|
Post by aido179 on Dec 17, 2007 13:50:24 GMT -5
aw man. thats tough. I hate to think about when I may end up breaking up wit my girfriend. but I am 16, and she is my first, so its bound to happen.....
But im happy atm.
if your happier now than you were then, its a good move.
|
|
|
|
Post by Phil on Dec 17, 2007 14:15:41 GMT -5
Like aido179 said and Beangirl said you are a wise person and break ups are bound to happen.
I actually knew my wife in school but we didn't date at that time. I was a senior when she was a sophomore and we kind of knew each other but never really thought we would end up marrying some years later.
There's a sad period of time after a break up but life goes on and it is very passing.
|
|
|
|
Post by Jersey on Dec 17, 2007 15:19:25 GMT -5
Guess I better make a list. 1. An engagement/early marriage. 2. A baby. 3. Break all ties with my family and move up to Maine with her and her family. 4. A tattoo of her name on me. 5. Expensive gifts/things I can't afford. 6. Sacrifice family time for extra time with her. 7. Upon moving to Maine, allow her to pay my way through college up there (after dropping out of my current school first). These are just the things she asked and demanded. This isn't to mention that I was always criticized for being late to her house (I was usually taking care of responsibilities at home). I also was constantly given a ration of sh*t whenever I chose something over her, such as my family. Things I had chosen weeks and months ago would constantly be brought up in current arguments. She always tried to use them against me. Towards the end of it all, she started discussing suicide. It all came to a head last Tuesday, when she told me that because of the choices I made (keeping my goals and not giving in to what she wanted) her life had no purpose anymore. She said that she was going to kill herself and in the process send her suicide letters to all her friends and members of her family, each of them saying that it was ok and that I had chosen this direction her life was to go. Basically, she was saying that she was going to commit suicide and blame me for it. It screwed me up mentally- so bad that I needed to go to a psychological counselor that we have on campus. She was a wonderful woman; she put my head back on straight and told me it was time for me to defend myself, break up with her, and tell her family about why it was happening and alert them to her suicidal threats. And I did just that. I ended it Saturday night. I'll soon be sending an email to that lady thanking her for helping me. Sorry about the long post but that's the whole story. If there are any questions please feel free to ask. I'm not really in a whole lot of pain; just disbelief that I put up with so much ridiculous sh*t for so long. |
|
|
|
Post by Kevin on Dec 17, 2007 18:26:32 GMT -5
Definitely not cool to be led around on a leash... you're better off without someone like that.
|
|
|
|
Post by Demona on Dec 17, 2007 19:26:53 GMT -5
Wow, and wasn't she the one you talked of being bothered by some guys in highschool some years ago? She needs help big time.
|
|
|
|
Post by Classicblast on Dec 17, 2007 22:49:46 GMT -5
I can actually see why you would say you're not that upset.
There's sadness in a severed longterm relationship but there is also some relief in pressure taken off of you.
I think you're bringing your life in a good direction. You're achieving an education and playing football. Meanwhile you're finding good recreational vices and you have a strong sense of responsibility.
Those are all great things. And I'm glad a consoler was able to help you realize the proper path to take in this crossroad.
|
|
|
|
Post by Jersey on Dec 17, 2007 23:34:56 GMT -5
Definitely not cool to be led around on a leash... you're better off without someone like that. That's a good way to describe it. And to Demona, yes this is the same girl who was having a lot of problems with idiots in her high school. She won't be having a problem there anymore, since she graduated. But, yes, she has some issues that she needs to get corrected. She will eventually move up to Maine (without me) and begin a new life for herself up there. I'll continue mine down here, find another girl, and start over. |
|
|
|
Post by Blastgirl on Dec 18, 2007 1:40:38 GMT -5
Well I am glad you have a goal and you're staying focused on achieving it. And I hope happiness results from this too.
|
|
|
|
Post by Mahnarch on Dec 18, 2007 4:53:44 GMT -5
Run. That's all I can say. Been there. Done that. I had a girl who would accuse me of cheating for going out to get the mail in my robe (my nearest neighbor is 2 miles away - apparantly I was screwing a girl in my driveway in less than a minute) She stabbed me in the arm that day. He also threw herself out of the truck while I was driving about 30mph+ because I wanted to stop by the house to drop off some stuff instead of going directly to her parent's house. She would also rent pr0n "for us" and get angry when it turned me on......yeah...too much info, that. Y'know, I'm like Sam Kinnison. I like the ladies and all, and I fall for their traps, every time. But, underneath, I know they're all devils waiting to pounce on you all gggggrrrrrrrrrrr!!!......except Blastgirl and Kimmie, of course.......*slowly backs behind the ficus in the corner* Sam on Marriage/relationships |
|
|
|
Post by Phil on Dec 18, 2007 14:13:40 GMT -5
She jumped out of a truck at 30 miles an hour? That's weird stuff man.
|
|
|
|
Post by Demona on Dec 19, 2007 5:15:31 GMT -5
Run. That's all I can say. Been there. Done that. I had a girl who would accuse me of cheating for going out to get the mail in my robe (my nearest neighbor is 2 miles away - apparantly I was screwing a girl in my driveway in less than a minute) She stabbed me in the arm that day. He also threw herself out of the truck while I was driving about 30mph+ because I wanted to stop by the house to drop off some stuff instead of going directly to her parent's house. She would also rent pr0n "for us" and get angry when it turned me on......yeah...too much info, that. Y'know, I'm like Sam Kinnison. I like the ladies and all, and I fall for their traps, every time. But, underneath, I know they're all devils waiting to pounce on you all gggggrrrrrrrrrrr!!!......except Blastgirl and Kimmie, of course.......*slowly backs behind the ficus in the corner* Sam on Marriage/relationshipsWoah that trumps his story majorly! Not all women are evil, but not all of them should trust guys either, I've met too many creeps. |
|
|
|
Post by Phil on Dec 19, 2007 14:42:51 GMT -5
It's not really a man vs woman thing.
There's a lot of wacky people in both genders and the world keeps getting worse.
But like a song Billy Joel sang 'We didn't start the fire'
The gist being that there's always troubles just different troubles. He has a good point.
|
|
