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Post by Demona on Jul 3, 2008 6:36:34 GMT -5
I had gas last night, and sure enough, had one brewing. Everyone was there. I tried to sneak it out quietly, but it betrayed me and made noise! Might as well own up to it, might as well announce it. I said to the guy walking behind me I'd just cut one. He knows I'm a farter and made the usual joke about how he had to walk right through it! Ever try to hold one back and you cut a loud one instead?
At least I'll admit it, unlike some. One old lady who works with us kept getting weird looks across the room. The hog next to her was the culprit, shamelessly passing gas SBD style. The nerve!
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Post by Sun of Centaur Moon of Lion on Jul 3, 2008 21:21:18 GMT -5
Now day's I want everyone to hear mine, and know that it was me ;D I was shy about it till I was about 19 though, I had a similar experience and Somebody else ended up being blamed, I know I wasn't brave at all back then,Oh well cant undo the past, I just fart proudly for today and the future ;D Anyhow there was this girl in my class sitting next to me and suddenly I let one totally by accident, not the loudest but certainly audible around the then quite classroom, This guy go's (girl's name) GROSS!!!, She did tell him it wasn't her and truthfully at that, Strange thing is she didn't bother to say that was Jason  By saying it wasn't her she may as well of just came out and identified me as the culprit because I was the only other one sitting in her general little area of the room, It went through my mind well maybe she was being kind and didn't want to embarrass me,then I thought no that wouldn't be it because everyone would know it was me if it wasn't her, Strange  People can act very strange when someone farts in public, It seems often the one's who hear the fart are almost as embarrassed as the culprit, Seem's many people get sort of flustered. Me and her had a quite understanding that I farted and she took the blame in other's eye's,(Everyone appeared to think she was just simply in denial over her own fart) man have time's changed with me now in my willingness to share loudly and confess ;D People thought of me and her both as weird but she was thought to be a bit less of a shy weird so I guess that's why they automatically assumed it was her,From what I know she didnt have a reputation as a fart enthusiast or anything. Great story Demona and that's the way to go if you don't choose to fart loudly in all situation's, Confess when it does make noise ;D |
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Post by Blastgirl on Jul 3, 2008 23:46:40 GMT -5
There's all different reactions.
I worked in a room with four of us and there were a lot of farts all the time. There was one person who absolutely refused to admit it.
But since she was the only non-admitting person, we kind of knew who was guilty by default. ;D
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Post by Beangirl on Jul 4, 2008 14:53:22 GMT -5
Yesterday at Wal*Fart.... I was escorting a old man out to his car on our electric scooters. He was paralyzed in his legs so he had to grab his walker and swing his lower body into the car. As he turned, he cut this HUGE fart ripppppppp!!!!!! right in my face. I cannot laugh because I am supposed to be polite. But Man! That was funny!!!  |
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Post by Demona on Jul 5, 2008 4:58:22 GMT -5
Did he know he cut the cheese or was he deaf? I don't think I could have helped but laugh!
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Kimm
Moderator 
Posts: 2,993
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Post by Kimm on Jul 6, 2008 7:29:20 GMT -5
The stagger farts are funny my grandpa does that all the time.
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Post by Beangirl on Jul 6, 2008 14:03:26 GMT -5
He knew he farted. He almost blew me out of the parking lot. |
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Kimm
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Post by Kimm on Jul 11, 2008 23:03:49 GMT -5
I volunteer at a day camp now that we are on summer break.
We were having some games the kids were playing capture the flag. I let out a burning sbd. It was me and 5 consolers
In a couple minutes everybody smelled it and started laughing.
One older guy goes "OK Who cut the cheese?"
I go "OH YEAH I DID IT!!!"
They had a hard time believing it was me. That made the rest of them laugh because they figured a fart that stinks that bad wouldnt have been me. They have no idea.
I did another before it was over too just like it. This time I go "you all might not want to breathe in too heavy."
It stunk just as bad as the other fart.
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Post by Sun of Centaur Moon of Lion on Jul 12, 2008 3:01:16 GMT -5
I was wondering if you ever shared your talent with the kid's you teach and/or oversee at camp Kim, I know that might seem like a strange thing to wonder, You know WHO?? Kim not share her gassy butt emission's But a lot of people very open about it otherwise tend to make exception's I think when it comes to kid's they relate to as some authority figure of sort's. I'm glad that doesn't stop you ;D New generation's need to grow up knowing farting proudly and saying YES!!! It was me!!!! isn't just for guy's ;D I never attended camp but the closest thing I had to a camp counselor authority figure would have been my teacher's and one of them in particular really got freaked when any of us would let rip in class, I can hear her now,Go to the bathroom Jason!!! GOOOOOOOO!!!!!! I sure never got to hear her rip one,What a laugh it would have been if she had just one time accidentally let one in front of us,That was never to be though  I liked her, She was very nice and a good teacher,Just not one for fart humor I'm afraid.If any of my teacher's were we didn't uhhh hear from that end of them if you catch my drift ;D I admit though I used to love to let loose just to get her reaction's they were priceless ;D |
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Kimm
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Post by Kimm on Jul 12, 2008 18:53:55 GMT -5
Never have I shared it with the kids I teach.
I did one fart while coaching the girls bowling team. It was actually kind of a misjudgment I thought it was going to be a quiet "puff" and instead it was a rather medium loud.
So I just said "Uhoh taco salad" or something like that and that was it.
The kids at camp I probably wont be too bashful about.
I had several writing assignments when I was in school. "I will not pass gas in the classroom" usually 100 times.
I was sent in the hall more than once too. ;D
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Post by Sun of Centaur Moon of Lion on Jul 14, 2008 4:58:47 GMT -5
I have a couple fart story's from the past few day's to tell as well,Including a Wal-Fart episode ;D I riped one in the checkout line while the cashier was ringing me up, It was a loud one that had sort of a very audible swissshhhhssss!!! Squidgy like ending, I burst out in my goofy I just farted laughter and the cashier go's who was that! There were two women in line behind me, I said it was me!! ;D She go's that's nasty,But at least your honest about it.
I kept looking back at the two young women behind me to see their reaction's the whole time, and one appeared to think it was funny ;D she was chuckling and took several step's back away from me, Neither of them said anything to me though, the other of the two women behind me had a pretty serious expression on her face for most of the ordeal, She would just maybe look at her friend and slightly chuckle from time to time. ;D The cashier had sort of a smirk on her face after the above exchange where I confessed, and every so often she would start laughing low keyed and shaking her head.I was like cool my butthole made quite a scene there. ;D The other one I'll share later,I don't feel like typing anymore right now.
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Post by Demona on Jul 14, 2008 19:51:46 GMT -5
I once let rip in Wal Mart a few years ago. I had to fart, and tried desperately to hold it in, but couldn't. Hoping it'd be quiet, it betrayed me and ripped out loudly. My friend was laughing, I was laughing, and the cashier was not amused. She had the same constipated expression on her face the whole time.
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Post by Beangirl on Jul 15, 2008 21:14:50 GMT -5
I cannot help it. I am a People Greeter at Wal * Fart and I eat peanut butter and honey and raw carrots for lunch. What's a door greeter to do? I usually cut a few SBDs right next to the bench inside where people wait.Once I let one rip against the security sensor panel. It sounded like a Tommy Gun... ;D No one but me heard it cuz it was late but I laughed and laughed. ;D
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Post by Pumpkin on Aug 1, 2008 15:52:50 GMT -5
Tommy gun......I just fell off my chair laughing!  This might go over the line of too much information, butt.......... I was taking a whiz one night and I farted so huge (BLAA-RUUUFFFF) that it knocked me slightly forward and off line .....I sprinkled all over the toilet bowl brush and waste basket.....I was laughing and cussing at the same time.  I was on clean up detail for that one.  |
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Post by fartinggurl on Aug 2, 2008 21:34:12 GMT -5
Tommy gun......I just fell off my chair laughing! This might go over the line of too much information, butt.......... I was taking a whiz one night and I farted so huge (BLAA-RUUUFFFF) that it knocked me slightly forward and off line .....I sprinkled all over the toilet bowl brush and waste basket.....I was laughing and cussing at the same time. I was on clean up detail for that one. That is soo funny. ;D |
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