Kimm
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Posts: 2,993
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Post by Kimm on May 6, 2008 20:49:26 GMT -5
I think I set a new personal record today.
I just got home from work and my mom was preparing supper. Im still a lowly inhouse sub so Im poor Ill take as many meals at the house if I can.
My dad and brother are watching an old wwf skit in a vhs tape and I came into the livingroom and go "Listen up!"
I knew it was going to be a big 1 but I didnt know how big until I let it out. I picked up my right leg standing only on my left, stuck my butt out a littlebit and let it rip.
It was definitely the longest single fart I can remember blowing.
BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB
BBBBBBBBPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
In seconds it was ripe.
My dad goes "you might want to make a trip upstairs and make sure it was only air."
My mom goes "Thats just raunch Kim, that might be a medical disorder to fart that loud and long."
Im like Oh well I blew a fart and I feel much better.
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Post by Mahnarch on May 9, 2008 2:18:10 GMT -5
Heh heh, good one, Kimmie!!!
Just the other day I was in MY stall (the handicapper one, since it's big....and has the plunger) and left quite a dooke.
I told my co-worker in the stall next to me that he has about 30 seconds to get out before my wrath vanquishes him.
He was gone in about 25.
I'm glad I was sitting down for that one.
I'd been letting a few go all day and had already had a few close calls.
This one would've been a laundry nightmare.
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Post by Beangirl on May 9, 2008 14:30:36 GMT -5
LOL! Both of you!!!!  |
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Kimm
Moderator
Posts: 2,993
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Post by Kimm on May 10, 2008 16:06:24 GMT -5
Yeah Im kind of disgusting about farting.
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Post by dannyboy on May 11, 2008 7:15:01 GMT -5
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Kimm
Moderator
Posts: 2,993
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Post by Kimm on May 11, 2008 17:00:10 GMT -5
KIND OF?  ?? Like last night at Friendlys Oh yeah. I had forgotten about that heeeehee hee. ;D |
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Post by fartinggurl on May 15, 2008 21:25:38 GMT -5
What happened at Friendly's? Funny story by the way. I farted a long BBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPP!! this morning, and boy did it stink. I also just farted a few seconds ago. It's wasn't too long or too loud, but it stinks.
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Kimm
Moderator
Posts: 2,993
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Post by Kimm on May 16, 2008 21:46:32 GMT -5
What happened at Friendly's? After bowling we were at Friendly's and my brother and my boyfriend were tugging of war at a saltshaker. I had had a good 1 brewing for a while but it came ready about then I was right between them and I lifted towards my boyfriend and let out a long loud rip. BBBBBBBBBPPPPPPPPPLLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTT I dont remember who ended up with the salt but I can say I "Peppered" both of them. ;D Someone at the next table turned around and then they kind of chuckled among themselves. My brother goes "You heard right, she farted!" ;D |
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Post by Antonio on May 16, 2008 22:00:43 GMT -5
Lol that is hilarious fart humor really isn't my cup of tea but it can be funny especially since it's a taboo with most girls. But my ex girlfriend whom im still friends with is literally the queen of farts she can out fart anybody even if you are 6'5 250 pounds, comeing from a guy I can swallow my pride and admit she got the best of me a couple of times.
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Kimm
Moderator
Posts: 2,993
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Post by Kimm on May 16, 2008 22:56:27 GMT -5
Im more gastric than my boyfriend my brother or my dad so thats just the way I am. ;D
Youre right though its a taboo. My mom has often been embarrassed by me farting and not caring who hears it.
My mom goes "Thats not very ladylike." And I know its not.
Some other times Ive heard other people say "That was that blond chick that did that." Or something like that.
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Post by Phil on May 23, 2008 13:55:35 GMT -5
Hmmm, ever think about bottling that energy? Maybe gas prices could go down. Or you could be the billionaire.
Who cares about ladylike if you're rich?
And [I'm hope this is ok to say this] Kim, when you look like you, you don't have to be ladylike.
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Kimm
Moderator
Posts: 2,993
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Post by Kimm on May 23, 2008 20:49:17 GMT -5
Thanks Phil, never thought of that.
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Post by Sun of Centaur Moon of Lion on May 26, 2008 1:49:50 GMT -5
[quote My mom goes "Thats just raunch Kim, that might be a medical disorder to fart that loud and long." Im like Oh well I blew a fart and I feel much better. [/quote] ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If one has to have a medical disorder, and it by some chance is one, Then that's the kind of medical disorder to have ;D I'm glad to hear after my extended absence from here that your buttly antics are still the Environmental Protection Agency's WORSE NIGHTMARE!!!!!  |
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Kimm
Moderator
Posts: 2,993
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Post by Kimm on May 30, 2008 19:03:10 GMT -5
Methane has been around as long as life theres no worry for the EPA.
Btw I just farted 3 times
BBBBBPPPPPPPLLLLLAAAAAATTTT
BBBBPPLLLLAAAAAATTTTTTT
BBBBBBPPPPPPPPLLLLLAAAAAATT
My dad shook his head and goes "Stay over there for a while."
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Post by Sun of Centaur Moon of Lion on Jun 16, 2008 7:39:49 GMT -5
I don't think there's anything unladylike so to speak about farting at all , In public or wherever my opinion of course  My step-mom used to give my sister the that's unladylike speech when she would go around farting and burping Of course I have a different definition than many as to what a lady is, Lady's in my opinion share, And that includes farts, I long for the it's unladylike to fart publicly speeches to disappear from human dialog someday  Then again it's sort of a mixed feeling's thing because I do have to admit I love the look of shock people get sometimes when a beautiful young woman rips one loudly and proudly ;D Of course gentlemen share as well so I dont really make any distinction's there. It's just the opinion I dont like nothing against your mom at all,not the person the opinion, And of course that's only my opinion and I think there is a saying that compares opinions to the very place that farts exit their prison from in the first place ;D  Wow that's something to ponder on ;D Seriously I mean it |
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Post by Antonio on Jun 16, 2008 16:35:57 GMT -5
Farting isn't the most unlady or ungentlemen thing to do, my ex is one of the sweetest and most polite women you will ever meet and she farts like a 300 pound truck driver. This past weekend at the mall she riped about 3 or 4 good ones at the food court and you wouldn't imagine the look on people faces who heard her. She also says it is good jerk repellent for sleezy guys who always try to hit on her.
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Post by Blastgirl on Jun 17, 2008 1:03:56 GMT -5
My Mom always would say "That's not very Ladylike."
Your Girlfriend is right it is good jerk replant. "Eaww, Girls aren't suppose to do that."
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Post by fartinggurl on Jun 18, 2008 16:05:12 GMT -5
I agree, farting is good jerk repellent.
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