Putting the "gross" in grocery store

[johnb1]

well, I have a confession to make. Last night, I was out of TP and stuff, so I hauled my rolly cart and me and off to my local grocery store across the street. It had snowed a whole bunch so getting over there and back was tough. Anyways, I found what I needed to and headed for the cashier. I'd been eating pork rinds, various kinds of salami, Chinese sausage and other cold cuts, and chuggin' the occasional mountain dew. I was fine until I dropped my wallet on the ground. I bent down to pick it up and that's when the stuff hit the fan. I think I commited nose-i-cide. I let off a putrid paint-peeling godawful stink by accident, mind you. The cashier's eyes started to water , and she started coughing and fanning with her clipboard. I was mortified. No sound either-just . All I could say was, Pardon me, I'm so sorry, and thank her for her help, and then get the hell out of there as fast as I could
just when I thought I couldn't make a stinkier fart, just when I thought I had my $hh...together, I did this.
Sometimes I can be a real ass

well, there it is

JB

[Beangirl]

LOL! I am a cashier at Wal Mart and get that a lot. Mostly it is me who toots gassing out the people at the next register.

[johnb1]

yeah- I suppose payback is fair. It's walmart, for crying out loud-what do you expect? Did I tell you about the time I crop-dusted most of a Walmart? Well, I did. thanks for the reply. Had Chinese food last night and an orchestra rehearsal of Christmas music (Oh the weather outside is frightful--and your farts aren't too delightful-let it blow, let it blow, let it blow) and I was praying that I wouldn't fart in the rehearsal. Luckily I did outside, in the car and at home. It's Panda Hut Chinese food. I call it panda Butt 'cuz it's powerful.

JB

[Phil]

Store isles are common battlegrounds to walk through farts. About 10 years ago I was in the shift supervisors office replacing a light fixture standing on a ladder. The old supervisor stands up walks around the ladder and this old guy rips ass like there's no tomorrow and then says 'Sorry Phil, couldn't hold it any longer.' Yeah that was horrendous but it was funny

[Kimm]

Cropdusting stores has always been fun.

I had a rocket fart about a week ago in Lowes it was the BBBBBBBBBBPPPPPPPPPPPLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT
type.

And it reeked. I cant stop laughing and such some people came down the aisle my dad says "you better plug your noses my daughter here just blew a big fart." Im like "Yeah I did." They chuckled and went about their business.