I just....

[Pumpkin]

I don't know if it was all the traveling and eating restaurant food or what, but I have been darn right explosive.

I have been dropping butt bombs right and left. Poor Mrs. Pumpkin!

She got ambushed last night. We got back from the grocery store and were carrying groceries in. I let a large BLAPBUPBARAFF loose in the garage. It was hot and kind of wet sounding. It really stunk like a couple of day old road kill rotting in the sun.

The Mrs. was opening the door to the garage when I started to say "careful, I just"...She had disappeared into the garage and into the fart zone.

I heard her coughing and cursing. I started laughing like a hyena. She glared at me and said, "did you have to do that while we are carrying groceries?"

I replied "well, you're always telling me that I should 'go outside and to do that'". She was not amused, but as I pointed out, with the garage door still open, it was kind of "outside". "STEP OUT OF THE GARAGE NEXT TIME!" She exclaimed.

Actually, I thought of that, but I never have quiet farts. They are always the volcano eruption type. Well, maybe I should give her a break and let the neighbors sample some home cooking next time. ;D

[Blastgirl]

Nothing says I love you like a good blasting fart. True love is never having to say EXCUSE ME. ;D

[fartinggurl]

It's always nice to share, especially a good, loud fart. ;D

[Pumpkin]

Poor Mrs. Pumpkin had a 1500 mile cross country road trip with me. It's a wonder she survived all the toxic fumes I released. ;D

One particular time stands out. We had just made a pit stop for food and gas....Well, I had plenty of gas already. As we were getting back into the car, I let go with a long and raspy VOOOLLLAAAAARRRRRUUUUFFFF followed by a complimentary BLUF. "Yeah, sure, you have to wait until we get back in the car to do that!" she growled. Yes, indeed, I did! ;D

[Demona]

I bet that roadkill was dead skunk! I can imagine the stench right now!

[Pumpkin]

I did it again. I promised my wife I never would....I broke down and had a couple of raisin bran muffins the last few days. The results have been explosive! ;D

Fortunately for her, it's mostly sound and fury. Not much stink, but dang, my belly looks like I swallowed a basketball. I did a giant BLLOOOOOOFFFFFF of a fart, and my belly noticeably shrank---for a few minutes. ;D Then it was back to inflation. ;D

[CharlesW1969 AKA Baron]

Pumpkin, I was on vacation back in May, we stopped at a farm market and they had Tropical Delight and dried apricots. I ate a ba of both and by that night, I was busting tail like I never did before. I bought those apricots because of what Colon Foul AKA Mr. Secretary of Stench described what it did to him. He wasn't foolin' by any means.

[Pumpkin]

Oh yeah, there's a reason I stay away from apricots! Raisins do a similar thing to me. That's why I have been officially banned from raisin bran muffins by the Mrs.

Baron, it's good to have you back in our midst! ;D Now we just need to get the Secretary of Stench back too.

[Pumpkin]

I let go a really raunchy one last night. Mrs. Pumpkin said "that smells like pig ----!" All I could say was "OINK OINK!" ;D

[Pumpkin]

Happy fourth of July to everyone.....Or in farting vernacular, the Farth of July. As Fartrick Henry once said, "Give me flatulence or give me death!" ;D