Post by Mahnarch on Jan 7, 2009 2:06:01 GMT -5
Now that I'm up and running, again, it's time to get back in the office and take a nap......errr, get to work.
On this episode of National Lewagraphic we'll investigate the life of one of the rarest, most intriguing creature on the planet - the intelligent pre-teen male.
Some British Narrator: "As we descend into the realm of the world of the vastly rare pre-teen we're met with an environment that's filled with wonderment. A world that..."
*Jason walks into the kitchen*
Continued in a whisper: "Shh! There he is! What a specimen!...and he appears to be on the hunt for food."
*Jason nears the toaster on the counter*
Continued: "Look as he tracks his prey with a tactile vigilance."
*the toaster pops up, revealing a Poptart. Jason grabs it*
Continued: "The Poptart never had a chance...."
Jason turns to the British narrator - who is actually Mahnarch, pretending to be a British narrator, hiding under the kitchen table with a tree branch sticking out the headband on his forehead.
Jason: "What are you doing?"
Mahnarch makes a feeble attempt at bird noises.
It doesn't work.
Cornered, Mahnarch bolts up to run away, only to crack his head into the underside of the table and knocking over the napkin holder in the center of said table.
Mahnarch explains himself - that he's an international spy who's trying to recruit a sidekick.
It doesn't work. He's just too smart.
Dang it!
They settle down for a quick interview:
1: How many stones do you weigh?
2: If you were to put your hands straight up into the air, would you reach taller than your dad's head (including his 'wild' hair)?
3: What's the last book you've read - not counting school books ('book reports' count)?
4: Say you were a ninja and you just scaled a wall, only to find an imperial guard on the other side who hasn't noticed you, yet. What would you do to get him to go away?
5: If you had $967,524.38 dollars, cash, what's the first thing you'd invest in?
6: What color is your Advanced Trigonomics book?
7: If you reach blindly to your....left...what's the first thing you touch/knock over?
8: How many slices of pizza can you consume in one setting?
9: What size was the biggest fish you've landed?
10: If you had a super-power, what would it be? (just one,,,not Superman's multiple powers)
11: If you'd constructed a pulley system on a 3:1 set up, could you use it lift a 150lb stone?
12: Have you ever out-bowled your dad or mom at the Bowling Alley?
13: You're playing Super Mario Brothers 3 and you've hit two '?' blocks. Out of one pops an invincibility star and out of the other pops a 'grow big' mushroom - headed in opposite directions. Which do you go for? Why?
14: Do you own your own knife? How big it is?
15: How many 'skips' can you get out of a flat stone across water?
16: Has your dad set up a college fund for you, yet? A 529, perhaps? Or, perhaps you're looking at a scholarship?
17: Batman is standing on the edge of a cliff. He has a 24ft foot gap to clear with no bridge and his Bat-jet will only clear a 20ft distance.
There is a single tree on the other side.
How does he get to the other side?
18: If you were standing on the moon, holding a pencil out in front of you and you let go of it, what would the pencil do? (of course, it's a #2 pencil)
19: 2x=10. Solve for 'x'.
20: When you're 18 will you get a tatoo? If so, of what?
***
I know Jason's a smart kid, so no cheating on the test questions from the adults!
Plus, I'm interested in hearing his idea on the Batman one.
After he answers, others can give ideas - the wilder, the better.
On this episode of National Lewagraphic we'll investigate the life of one of the rarest, most intriguing creature on the planet - the intelligent pre-teen male.
Some British Narrator: "As we descend into the realm of the world of the vastly rare pre-teen we're met with an environment that's filled with wonderment. A world that..."
*Jason walks into the kitchen*
Continued in a whisper: "Shh! There he is! What a specimen!...and he appears to be on the hunt for food."
*Jason nears the toaster on the counter*
Continued: "Look as he tracks his prey with a tactile vigilance."
*the toaster pops up, revealing a Poptart. Jason grabs it*
Continued: "The Poptart never had a chance...."
Jason turns to the British narrator - who is actually Mahnarch, pretending to be a British narrator, hiding under the kitchen table with a tree branch sticking out the headband on his forehead.
Jason: "What are you doing?"
Mahnarch makes a feeble attempt at bird noises.
It doesn't work.
Cornered, Mahnarch bolts up to run away, only to crack his head into the underside of the table and knocking over the napkin holder in the center of said table.
Mahnarch explains himself - that he's an international spy who's trying to recruit a sidekick.
It doesn't work. He's just too smart.
Dang it!
They settle down for a quick interview:
1: How many stones do you weigh?
2: If you were to put your hands straight up into the air, would you reach taller than your dad's head (including his 'wild' hair)?
3: What's the last book you've read - not counting school books ('book reports' count)?
4: Say you were a ninja and you just scaled a wall, only to find an imperial guard on the other side who hasn't noticed you, yet. What would you do to get him to go away?
5: If you had $967,524.38 dollars, cash, what's the first thing you'd invest in?
6: What color is your Advanced Trigonomics book?
7: If you reach blindly to your....left...what's the first thing you touch/knock over?
8: How many slices of pizza can you consume in one setting?
9: What size was the biggest fish you've landed?
10: If you had a super-power, what would it be? (just one,,,not Superman's multiple powers)
11: If you'd constructed a pulley system on a 3:1 set up, could you use it lift a 150lb stone?
12: Have you ever out-bowled your dad or mom at the Bowling Alley?
13: You're playing Super Mario Brothers 3 and you've hit two '?' blocks. Out of one pops an invincibility star and out of the other pops a 'grow big' mushroom - headed in opposite directions. Which do you go for? Why?
14: Do you own your own knife? How big it is?
15: How many 'skips' can you get out of a flat stone across water?
16: Has your dad set up a college fund for you, yet? A 529, perhaps? Or, perhaps you're looking at a scholarship?
17: Batman is standing on the edge of a cliff. He has a 24ft foot gap to clear with no bridge and his Bat-jet will only clear a 20ft distance.
There is a single tree on the other side.
How does he get to the other side?
18: If you were standing on the moon, holding a pencil out in front of you and you let go of it, what would the pencil do? (of course, it's a #2 pencil)
19: 2x=10. Solve for 'x'.
20: When you're 18 will you get a tatoo? If so, of what?
***
I know Jason's a smart kid, so no cheating on the test questions from the adults!
Plus, I'm interested in hearing his idea on the Batman one.
After he answers, others can give ideas - the wilder, the better.
